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Category: ChuckNorris
Message: Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Submitted By: sillyrabbit

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Statistics Away Messages

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Every year, about 6,500 Americans are injured by their toilet seats.
  • Currently 3.78/5
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3.8/5 (135 votes)

Submitted by: kamaniwana02
Statistics show that 5 of every 7 Americans say they don't want to be a statistic.
  • Currently 3.81/5
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3.8/5 (86 votes)

Submitted by: 
The chances of meeting someone with Barbie's human-scale measurements (36-18-33) is 1 in 100,000. The chances of meeting someone with Ken's is 1 in 50.
  • Currently 3.69/5
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3.7/5 (118 votes)

Submitted by: ncjon118
A study was done of about 200 ostriches over a period of about 80 years. In the period of time, not a single case was reported of an ostrich sticking its head in the ground.
  • Currently 3.68/5
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3.7/5 (78 votes)

Submitted by: dchicky
90% of the worlds population are idiots and the other 10% ar in great danger of contamination
  • Currently 3.72/5
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3.7/5 (129 votes)

Submitted by: xxRoXyCutiePiExx
You can use statistics to prove anything, 14% of people know that.
  • Currently 3.68/5
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3.7/5 (87 votes)

Submitted by: Homer
Americans spend twice as much money on pornography than they do on cookies.
  • Currently 3.69/5
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3.7/5 (127 votes)

Submitted by: kamaniwana02
A pot smoker is busted every 45 seconds! No wonder we're paranoid!
  • Currently 3.65/5
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3.7/5 (138 votes)

Submitted by: Laurie L 1039
EVERYDAY
1,377 Teenagers Become Mothers.
1,106 Teenage Girls Get An Abortion.
500 Adolescents Begin Using Drugs
4,219 Teenagers Get A Sexually Transmitted Disease.
1,000 Adolescents Begin Drinking Alcohol.
3,610 Teens Are Assaulted & 80 Are Raped.
2,861 Teens Drop Out Of School.
420 Children Are Arrested For Drug Abuse.
 5,388 Youths Are Arrested.
6 Teens Commit Suicide.
--DON'T BE ANOTHER STATISTIC
  • Currently 3.72/5
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3.7/5 (68 votes)

Submitted by: yeahman232
9 out of every 10 people think that 1 out of every 10 people will disagree with the other 90% that have taken this test
  • Currently 3.60/5
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3.6/5 (72 votes)

Submitted by: hawaiinpride17
84.1 of all statistics are made up on the spot.
  • Currently 3.54/5
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3.5/5 (102 votes)

Submitted by: BlOnDiE911
Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.
  • Currently 3.53/5
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3.5/5 (116 votes)

Submitted by: Ozzy



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