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Category: Friendship
Message: I shave my legs, I sit down to pee. And I can justify any shopping spree.
Don't go to a barber, but a beauty salon. I can get a massage without a hard-on.
I can balance the checkbook, I can pump my own gas. Can talk to my friends, about the size of my ass.
My beauty's a masterpiece, and yes, it takes long. At least I can admit, to others when I'm wrong.
I don't drive in circles, at any cost. And I don't have a problem, admitting I'm lost.
I never forget, an important date. You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late.
I don't watch movies, with lots of gore. Don't need instant replay, to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch. And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch.
Don't say to your friends, Oh yeah, I can get her. In your dreams, my dear, I can do better!
Flowers are okay, But jewelry's best. Look at me you idiot... Not at my chest????
I don't have a problem, With Expressing my feelings. I know when you're lying, You look at the ceiling.
DON'T call me a GIRL , a BABE or a CHICK . I am a WOMAN. Get it?, you DICK!?!
Submitted By: HaCkErS

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New Years Away Messages

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Fireworks are brightening up the sky,
the sparkling ball is dropping from up high,
the New Year is almost here... so party it up, scream n' cheer!!
*^*HAPPY NEW YEAR'S EVERYONE*^*
  • Currently 3.71/5
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3.7/5 (153 votes)

Submitted by: rockstr358
The way I see New Years is it isnít about making resolutions, itís about forgetting the ones you made last year!
  • Currently 3.44/5
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3.4/5 (101 votes)

Submitted by: 
As you are reading this message a year is passing you by...Seriously you are wasting the last 10 seconds of 2006...Don't believe me?!? Well whadya know 2007 here we go! Happy New Year!
  • Currently 3.35/5
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3.4/5 (54 votes)

Submitted by: 
Getting drunk with the family!!...ahh real quality time!! HAPPY NEW YEARS!!
  • Currently 3.30/5
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3.3/5 (56 votes)

Submitted by: 
Right now I'm looking for %n... I need them for New Year's Eve, if you know what I mean ;)
  • Currently 3.31/5
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3.3/5 (35 votes)

Submitted by: defrosted
My New Years resolution is not to spend so much time chatting online...
  • Currently 3.24/5
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3.2/5 (51 votes)

Submitted by: SoFtBaLL
Some people stay up to watch the ball drop at midnight, but I stay up for the alcohol and the kisses at midnight!
  • Currently 3.18/5
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3.2/5 (56 votes)

Submitted by: CheerChic88
Watching my balls drop. See ya in 2007!
  • Currently 3.21/5
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3.2/5 (63 votes)

Submitted by: DancingLzrd
**Sorry gone** Get back to you in 2007.
  • Currently 3.16/5
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3.2/5 (32 votes)

Submitted by: Kelly
5....4....3....2...1....Happy New Year... What did you say? Oh New Year isn't until 12:00 and its only %t? darnit!
  • Currently 3.16/5
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3.2/5 (83 votes)

Submitted by: Ridemcowgurl22
Pop the wine bottles...shoot it in the air...scream and shout! For it is New Years! Girls dump your boyfriendz and flirt just a little... and then drink lots of beer and take a piddle! BBL...leave me some love...
  • Currently 3.16/5
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3.2/5 (45 votes)

Submitted by: chica banana yo
Wacthing the fireworks for the New Year instead of talking to you, so leave a message and I'll see it next year.
  • Currently 3.11/5
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3.1/5 (28 votes)

Submitted by: skittelsrules

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