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Category: Friendship
Message: I shave my legs, I sit down to pee. And I can justify any shopping spree.
Don't go to a barber, but a beauty salon. I can get a massage without a hard-on.
I can balance the checkbook, I can pump my own gas. Can talk to my friends, about the size of my ass.
My beauty's a masterpiece, and yes, it takes long. At least I can admit, to others when I'm wrong.
I don't drive in circles, at any cost. And I don't have a problem, admitting I'm lost.
I never forget, an important date. You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late.
I don't watch movies, with lots of gore. Don't need instant replay, to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch. And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch.
Don't say to your friends, Oh yeah, I can get her. In your dreams, my dear, I can do better!
Flowers are okay, But jewelry's best. Look at me you idiot... Not at my chest????
I don't have a problem, With Expressing my feelings. I know when you're lying, You look at the ceiling.
DON'T call me a GIRL , a BABE or a CHICK . I am a WOMAN. Get it?, you DICK!?!
Submitted By: HaCkErS

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Insult Away Messages

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Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but %n abuses the privilege.
  • Currently 3.85/5
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3.9/5 (289 votes)

Submitted by: tadros87
I am not anti-social..I just don't like you
  • Currently 3.94/5
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3.9/5 (370 votes)

Submitted by: soccerbballangel
Hmm...I dont know what your probelm is...but I'm going to bet it's really hard to pronounce...
  • Currently 3.89/5
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3.9/5 (287 votes)

Submitted by: E1ScorchoDHS
God made mountains, god made trees, god made you but we all make mistakes.
  • Currently 3.76/5
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3.8/5 (182 votes)

Submitted by: Tiffany
Don't let your mind wander. It's way to small to be outside by itself!
  • Currently 3.81/5
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3.8/5 (496 votes)

Submitted by: linzluvr333
I had a nightmare. I dreamt I was you.
  • Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (446 votes)

Submitted by: meshell876
Earth is full. Go home.
  • Currently 3.76/5
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3.8/5 (429 votes)

Submitted by: NoMeGustaRats
I need you...........I want you............To get offline
  • Currently 3.78/5
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3.8/5 (383 votes)

Submitted by: SmallFry
Beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone
  • Currently 3.79/5
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3.8/5 (100 votes)

Submitted by: Elly's BFFL
Until you IM'ed me I couldn't remember the last time I wanted somebody's fingers to break so badly.
  • Currently 3.83/5
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3.8/5 (246 votes)

Submitted by: CheshireCat
I'm not mean ... you're just a sissy.
  • Currently 3.81/5
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3.8/5 (118 votes)

Submitted by: clutzy00001
I didnt ask to be beautiful, god just made me that way. You on the other hand, should have asked, cuz god made you the ugliest thing ever!
  • Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (106 votes)

Submitted by: Douy

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