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Away Message of the Moment

Category: Poem
Message: Never say I love you, if it isn't really there
Never talk about feelings, if you really don't care
Never hold my hand, if you're gonna break my heart
Never say you are gonna, if you don't plan to start
Never look into my eyes and all you do is lie
Never say hello if you really mean goodbye
If you really mean forever, Then please say you'll try ..
Never say forever.. Because forever makes me cry...
Submitted By: qt

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Gross Away Messages

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What sexual position produces the ugliest children? ASK YOUR MOM!! haha //leave a message
  • Currently 4.01/5
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4.0/5 (1206 votes)

Submitted by: none
Random Erection...Walking it off
  • Currently 3.97/5
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4.0/5 (742 votes)

Submitted by: spicrus69
A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking.
The wife asks, "What are you waiting for?"
The husband replies, "Autumn."
  • Currently 4.04/5
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4.0/5 (167 votes)

Submitted by: Dulce Chica
I'm out like a boner in sweatpants!
  • Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (633 votes)

Submitted by: derrick67538
If I could be an instrument, I would be a french horn, so all the girls could blow me.....
  • Currently 3.71/5
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3.7/5 (428 votes)

Submitted by: still fly mbp
There was a old couple laying in bed ...the old man farts...then the lady said what was that he said fart football! so two mins later she blows a big one! they laugh ..like 5 mins later he farts, but just a little squeaker, ..then all of a suden the lady farts and poops in the bed and the man said ..what the hell was that..she said half time...switch sides!
  • Currently 3.68/5
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3.7/5 (151 votes)

Submitted by: u dont kno me
Gone, like your moms virginity
  • Currently 3.43/5
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3.4/5 (415 votes)

Submitted by: Z
Yo daddy is so bald, when he wears a turtleneck, he looks like a broken condom.
  • Currently 3.38/5
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3.4/5 (382 votes)

Submitted by: me
If I was a woman, every time I had to go to the gynecologist, I’d fake an orgasm.
  • Currently 3.45/5
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3.4/5 (291 votes)

Submitted by: CyrusArtimus
I had a dream I was eating chocolate pudding then woke up with a spoon in my.......
  • Currently 3.33/5
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3.3/5 (412 votes)

Submitted by: jayjobo
Deck the halls, bye bye great falls. Wipe my ass and lick my balls! It's Stiffler time baby!
  • Currently 3.26/5
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3.3/5 (406 votes)

Submitted by: AF6837
The only reason that I sleep at night is becuase I look forward to morning wood.
  • Currently 3.34/5
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3.3/5 (249 votes)

Submitted by: Oldsk00l123

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