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If you want me to fall for you, you better get something for me to trip over.
- Currently 3.75/5
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3.7/5 (1027 votes)
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Submitted by: Chels |
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Two words guys hate... don't & stop unless you put them together!
- Currently 3.70/5
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3.7/5 (1034 votes)
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Submitted by: creamanpeachez |
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I'm not here right now, but if you'd like to reach me on my cell phone... buy me a cell phone.
- Currently 3.71/5
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3.7/5 (1095 votes)
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Submitted by: boddah2k |
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Nobody is perfect. I am Nobody. Therefore I am perfect.
- Currently 3.73/5
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3.7/5 (1111 votes)
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Submitted by: BrBiegrl90210 |
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Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.
- Currently 3.78/5
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3.8/5 (1149 votes)
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Submitted by: MICHAE2414 |
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Mickey Divorces Minnie Judge: Mickey you can't divorce Minnie on the account that she's silly. Mickey: I didn't say she was silly, I said she was f**king Goofy!!
- Currently 3.77/5
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3.8/5 (1177 votes)
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Submitted by: XootemptationXoo |
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You are probably doing one of these two things:
1. You think you are slick by checking my profile to see what my away message is, so you don't have to IM me and look stupid.
-or-
2. You are looking stupid because there is a little yellow post-it right next to my name, and yet you still IM me.(With the exception that I was talking to you before and now you are answering me, and in that case you are SLOW!)
- Currently 3.64/5
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3.6/5 (1178 votes)
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Submitted by: P1NKFLAM1NGOZ |
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The first time I was chatting with someone online, they asked me "asl?" I tried to sound it out and got realy ticked of and started warning them because I thought they were calling me an asshole.
- Currently 3.72/5
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3.7/5 (1181 votes)
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Submitted by: skiendog |
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My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.
- Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (1220 votes)
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Submitted by: BunBun |
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I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive...But suicide's a crime :-/
- Currently 3.91/5
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3.9/5 (1583 votes)
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Submitted by: BluesCluesGrl362 |
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I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again.
- Currently 3.85/5
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3.8/5 (1592 votes)
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Submitted by: luckyangel5346 |
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The sky was dark, The moon was high,
We were alone, just her and I,
Her hair was brown, her eyes were too
I knew just what she wanted to do,
So with my courage I did my best,
I placed my handupon her breast,
I trembled and shook and felt her heart,
Slowly she spread her leags apart,
I knew she was ready, But I didnt know how,
It was my first try, At milking a cow.
- Currently 3.94/5
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3.9/5 (1601 votes)
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Submitted by: sweet12 |
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