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Category: Girl
Message: Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright
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Funny Away Messages

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I am on a quest to the deepest darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for a may not return alive.
  • Currently 3.70/5
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3.7/5 (653 votes)

Submitted by: NoMeGustaRats
hello %n, im a little busy, if it's an emergency, call 911
  • Currently 2.53/5
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2.5/5 (75 votes)

Submitted by: username
Are you aware of the discovery in the human body of a nerve that connects the eyeball to the asshole? It is called the anal optic nerve. It is responsible for giving people a sh*tty outlook on life. If you don't believe me, pulla hair from your ass and see if it doesn't bring a tear to your eye.
  • Currently 3.67/5
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3.7/5 (853 votes)

Submitted by: 
Is there a reason why you keep on IMing me? Do you need help? There is a program just for you called... Mavis Beacon!
  • Currently 1.64/5
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1.6/5 (269 votes)

Submitted by: P1NKFLAM1NGOZ
Ahhh I'm running after the bad guy who took my pack of Skittles..... I worked hard for that pack..... Ahhh he's eating them!!! Now he's throwing them at me.... Call 911!!!
  • Currently 3.25/5
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3.2/5 (286 votes)

Submitted by: 
I am away right now, so please leave your name, number, and a message, after you hear the tone...
  • Currently 1.60/5
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1.6/5 (413 votes)

Submitted by: weenkie67
Hey %n I am not at my computer right now cause while I was away my computer ran away, so I am chaseing it right now. If you see me go past your house running after a computer, put up this away message and come and help me!
  • Currently 2.69/5
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2.7/5 (91 votes)

Submitted by: ?
I am not here at the moment please leave a message after the beep.
shut the *BEEP* up!
  • Currently 2.08/5
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2.1/5 (80 votes)

Submitted by: drucool
WARNING! Never attempt to directly fax anyone an image of your naked buttocks. Always photocopy your buttocks and fax the photocopy.
-Warning label on a fax machine
  • Currently 3.15/5
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3.2/5 (142 votes)

Submitted by: ncjon118
Did anyone ever ask you if your fridge was running? Well someone just asked me, and now I'm running down the street trying to catch it. Be back as soon as I catch it and drag it back to my house. :-)
  • Currently 2.43/5
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2.4/5 (80 votes)

Submitted by: Candy4Me123
You have reached the reverend (yourscreenname's) confession hotline. Please leave your sin, and I'll get back to you with a penance. Remember that a confession doesn't count unless it's a vivid, detailed, blow-by-blow description of the sin. Thank you.
  • Currently 3.24/5
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3.2/5 (196 votes)

Submitted by: ncjon118
I'm having a staring contest with the wall. It's harder than I thought! Anyway, when I win, I'll be back.
  • Currently 3.19/5
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3.2/5 (130 votes)

Submitted by: brattyblue4

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