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I'm busy right now but leave your name and number so I can throw it away.
- Currently 3.24/5
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3.2/5 (131 votes)
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Submitted by: Six66and1half |
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Someday my prince will come he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask for directions.
- Currently 3.79/5
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3.8/5 (633 votes)
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Submitted by: mltrack87 |
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Rules of me:
#1. i am always right
#2, just in case i am wrong see rule #1
- Currently 3.91/5
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3.9/5 (1786 votes)
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Submitted by: i aint tellin |
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This place reeks of evil. Either that, or it's sausage... Nope, I'm pretty sure it's evil.
- Currently 3.19/5
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3.2/5 (189 votes)
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Submitted by: NoMeGustaRats |
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It's only funny untilsomeone gets hurt...then it's hilarious!!!
- Currently 3.63/5
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3.6/5 (625 votes)
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Submitted by: bombsaway003 |
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Firefighter: At one point we decided to fight fire with fire... Well...basically... your house burned even faster.
-Warning label on a fax machine
- Currently 2.64/5
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2.6/5 (81 votes)
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Submitted by: ncjon118 |
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The zoo called....they want you back in the cages with the other monkeys!!
- Currently 2.96/5
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3.0/5 (115 votes)
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Submitted by: meg |
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I'm out...If you need to reach me call 1-800-I-Need-A-Life
- Currently 2.49/5
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2.5/5 (72 votes)
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Submitted by: Coronababy |
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To see your future, look below...
Some person called (your screen name)will be back in a couple minutes!
- Currently 2.19/5
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2.2/5 (68 votes)
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Submitted by: Ilikemuffinz8778 |
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Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
My house is on fire!!!
Must....save....computer....
kinda preoccupied at the moment, please leave message, oh yeah, and call 911, must....save......computer......
- Currently 2.94/5
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2.9/5 (161 votes)
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Submitted by: snookthebook |
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Dude did u know that a gorilla escaped? Well I didn't either until it knocked on my door, called me a dirty ho, and kicked me in the leg! So right now I am chasin that damn monkey! I'm gonna knock his lights out! Yeah thats what I'm gonna do so chill 4 a bit..!
- Currently 2.99/5
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3.0/5 (177 votes)
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Submitted by: lilstarbaby1205 |
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If you sleep with a girl without protection, you're having sex with everyone your partner had sex with before. So if your girlfriend slept with a guy, who slept with your ex g/f, who you slept with, technically you could be screwing yourself.
- Currently 3.59/5
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3.6/5 (445 votes)
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Submitted by: sanitysgstd099 |
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