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A husband and wife were moving from Illinois to Florida. The husband left 5 days earlier. He sent an e-mail to his wife when he got to their new home. He accidently typed in the wrong adress, and it was sent to an eldery woman whose husband had just died. The message read:
"Dear my love,
I've just arrived for my destination. Plans are made for your arrival tommorrow.
Love, Your Husband
P.S. It sure is warm down here.
- Currently 4.37/5
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4.4/5 (1842 votes)
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Submitted by: KBizzle2321 |
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Dr. Seuss' lost tounge twister
see if you can do this:
This is this cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is a cat
This is dumbass cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat.
Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top. Betcha you can't resist passing it on.
- Currently 3.96/5
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4.0/5 (11768 votes)
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Submitted by: wzac |
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When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.
- Currently 3.98/5
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4.0/5 (4729 votes)
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Submitted by: fetterattereich |
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You know what pisses me off? People who point at the wrist when asking the time, i know where my watch is buddy where they f**k is yours? I mean do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is??
- Currently 3.97/5
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4.0/5 (4664 votes)
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Submitted by: lilojewel |
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Sex is a Sensation caused by a Temptation.when a guy sticks his Location in a girls Destination,to Increase population for the next Generation..u get my Explanation or need a Demonstration?!?!
- Currently 3.97/5
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4.0/5 (462 votes)
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Submitted by: iluvdavey1418 |
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How can you keep an idiot busy? Click Here to find out...
- Currently 3.85/5
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3.9/5 (2080 votes)
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Submitted by: sanitysgstd099 |
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I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive...But suicide's a crime :-/
- Currently 3.91/5
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3.9/5 (1509 votes)
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Submitted by: BluesCluesGrl362 |
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I used to hate it when aunts and grandmas, used to come up to me at weddings and pinch my cheeks and say "Your next" "Your next". Well they stopped doin that crap when i started to do it to them at funerals. BRB
- Currently 3.94/5
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3.9/5 (4614 votes)
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Submitted by: Sara |
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Rules of me:
#1. i am always right
#2, just in case i am wrong see rule #1
- Currently 3.90/5
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3.9/5 (1705 votes)
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Submitted by: i aint tellin |
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The sky was dark, The moon was high,
We were alone, just her and I,
Her hair was brown, her eyes were too
I knew just what she wanted to do,
So with my courage I did my best,
I placed my handupon her breast,
I trembled and shook and felt her heart,
Slowly she spread her leags apart,
I knew she was ready, But I didnt know how,
It was my first try, At milking a cow.
- Currently 3.93/5
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3.9/5 (1540 votes)
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Submitted by: sweet12 |
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10 Reasons to Date a Hockey Player
1. They always wear protection
2. They have great hands
3. They are used to scoring
4. They have great stamina
5. They find the opening and get it in
6. They never miss the target
7. They know how to use their wood
8. They have long sticks
9.They know when to play rough
10. Because baseball players only know how to hit balls.
- Currently 3.90/5
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3.9/5 (908 votes)
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Submitted by: DuckyHockey02 |
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There was a cub, a cardinal, a yankee and a red sox player on top of a cliff. The cub player said "this is for my team" and jumped off of the cliff. The cardinal player wanted to be a better person so he said "this is for my team" and ran then flipped off of the cliff. The yankee and the red sox player looked at each other both thinking "i don't really wanna die". But after a long period of waiting, the red sox player goes, "you know what, this is for my team" and pushed the yankee player of the cliff!
- Currently 3.86/5
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3.9/5 (528 votes)
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Submitted by: youll neva know! |
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