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Category: Gross
Message: My name is Steve Stiffler and I have an 11 inch penis.....around. Think about it
Submitted By: AF6837

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Christmas Away Messages

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Hey, I am not here right now because it is Christmas morning, and I've been good all year. You, %n, must have not been good because you are not opening Christmas presents! If you want to, you can come to my house and I will share all of my presents with you! After all, this is the season of giving! Merry Christmas, %n!
  • Currently 2.25/5
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2.3/5 (8 votes)

Submitted by: mememeeeeeee
I am here to tell you, I asked Santa to show himself for Christmas. I believe I got what I wanted, because there is a naked fat man in my house!
  • Currently 2.33/5
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2.3/5 (9 votes)

Submitted by: bebop
It's Christmas time, again,
It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand, all year,
I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer,
You people scare me,
Please stay away from my home,
If you don't wanna get beat down,
Just leave the presents and then leave me alone.
  • Currently 2.25/5
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2.3/5 (8 votes)

Submitted by: x malibu391 x
~*~If I had a snowflake for every reason why I love you, the whole world would be full of snowflakes~*~
  • Currently 2.27/5
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2.3/5 (11 votes)

Submitted by: ?????
Why is Santa alwayz so0o0o0o jolly??? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live..haha.. brb
  • Currently 2.30/5
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2.3/5 (10 votes)

Submitted by: anonymous
Christmas is the best time of year to spend with family. Man...I sure wish my butt could be sitting here at the computer instead of pertending to be nice infront of all of my family!!!
  • Currently 2.38/5
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2.4/5 (29 votes)

Submitted by: ZMEG5890
I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus...and now I'm at the hospital recovering cause that was just plain sick. Be home soon.
  • Currently 2.39/5
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2.4/5 (36 votes)

Submitted by: Caneily
Sorry, I am too busy ripping open Christmas presents to talk to you.
  • Currently 2.38/5
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2.4/5 (24 votes)

Submitted by: SouthernChick838
Practicing my christmas carols-
On the first day of christmas
my true love gave to me
a Partridge in a Pear Tree
On the second day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me,
Two Turtle Doves,
And a Partridge in a Pear Tree.
On the third day.... oh f*** it
  • Currently 2.36/5
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2.4/5 (11 votes)

Submitted by: haha funny
Did Santa come early this year? Because you were first on my Christmas list!
  • Currently 2.44/5
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2.4/5 (9 votes)

Submitted by: Ashmer11
I'm the one who gives out the coal and you just IMed me on CHRISTMAS therefore you are NAUGHTY. So do you want one lump, *puts up left fist*, or two lumps *puts up right fist*?
  • Currently 2.36/5
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2.4/5 (11 votes)

Submitted by: dpookiebear
Do you think your cool that your spending your day on the computer on christmas day?!?! haha your not! Go play with your toys now!! ....
  • Currently 2.48/5
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2.5/5 (23 votes)

Submitted by: Samshot!

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