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Category: ponder
Message: Think everyone's flawless? Just imagine the person you think is most perfect taking a crap.
Submitted By: Anonymous

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Christmas Away Messages

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Making you a home made present, be back as soon as I fish it outta the toilet. Merry Christmas Everyone!!!
  • Currently 3.20/5
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3.2/5 (15 votes)

Submitted by: x00xBlindManx00x
On Christmas Morning I will be opening lots of gifts and I will not be on the computer. So if there is a problem with this talk to Santa.
  • Currently 3.09/5
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3.1/5 (53 votes)

Submitted by: Demon on fire 22
Its begining to look at lot like christmas! I'm outside playing in the snow and drinking hot coco, so leave a message and I'll get back to you later!
  • Currently 3.09/5
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3.1/5 (33 votes)

Submitted by: merrychristmas26
I know why I can't think of what I want for Christmas!! I already have you.
  • Currently 3.09/5
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3.1/5 (55 votes)

Submitted by: Rockerchic2988
I too upset to talk to anyone; someone told me Santa isn't real. Leave me a message and I will get back to after some counseling.
  • Currently 3.14/5
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3.1/5 (78 votes)

Submitted by: Reef
Let's go for a sleigh ride
A wonderful sleigh ride
Come hurry along with a song in a wintery world to glide
Just hear those sleigh bells jingling ringting tinglin too
C'mon its lovely weather for a sleigh ride togther with you
Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling "YooHoo" C'mon its lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
  • Currently 3.10/5
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3.1/5 (29 votes)

Submitted by: 
Rose's are red
Violets are blue
I'm christmas shopping
so I don't end up like u!
  • Currently 3.10/5
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3.1/5 (20 votes)

Submitted by: soccerstars789
Why is santa so fat you ask? Well it 's because he goes all around the world eating cookies . Especially from you %n . You're not helping!
  • Currently 3.09/5
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3.1/5 (11 votes)

Submitted by: turtleandrea
Dashing through the snow.
On my new snowboard today!!
Going down a hill
laughing all the way(ha ha ha).
Until I hit a tree.
And was bleeding furiously.
This Christmas was not very fun for me!!! Hey!
  • Currently 3.07/5
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3.1/5 (30 votes)

Submitted by: yoyoman13
T'was the night before christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. Mom at the warehouse, dad smoking grass, I had just settled down for a nice piece of a**, when out on the lawn I saw a big dick, I knew in a moment it must be st. nick. He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell, I knew in a moment that f*cker had fell. He filled all our stocking with pretzels and beer and a big rubber d*** for my brother the queer. He went up the chimney with a tip of his hat, Merry Christmas to all, damn "he's fat".
  • Currently 3.14/5
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3.1/5 (37 votes)

Submitted by: Prancer
You know Santa, this year I don't want presents. Isn't Christmas about spending quality time together? And celebrating the birth of Jesus? But actually, now that I think about it, there is one small thing that I would like this Christmas. A copy of all the babes who have been naughty...GRRRR........;)
  • Currently 3.14/5
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3.1/5 (7 votes)

Submitted by: callahanliz
Santa asked me "What do you want for Christmas?" I said "A want a barbie and a G.I. Joe" He said " Doesn't barbie come with Ken?" I said" No, She just fakes it with Ken" BRB.
  • Currently 2.97/5
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3.0/5 (61 votes)

Submitted by: Cutiegirl43

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